How's Life Treated Me So Far

I started 2013 in a high spirit, having had sent Abang Iqie to his first ever primary school, and Afeeq to his kindergarten. 

Then, on the second week of January (13 Jan 2013), I received a call in the middle of the night from my sister in Rawang telling me that my half brother Musa bin Ahmad had passed away in a car accident. We rushed back to Kluang and witness his burial. May Allah bless his soul.

When we came back to KL, I just had such bad feelings about things. I had the urge to talk to my dad about things, but I never made the attempt. I called him a few times after that, but didn't manage to talk to him. There was one time though, I think it was on Wednesday, 16 Jan 2013, that he called me back. We talked briefly, then I passed the phone to my three kids as he always wanted to talk to them, Abang Iqie especially. 

Then on that fateful Friday (18 Jan 2013), my sister text me saying that Abah was warded in the hospital. I called my mum and we talked for a while. Then, I called Abah himself. We had a good chat, and as always I tried to make him feel bad about his smoking, and he jokingly said that he had threw all his cigarettes away. But he also mentioned that he was affected by a few of his friend's deaths after my brother's departure. The whole while we were on the phone, I could hear him trying to catch his breaths. Before putting down the phone, I told him to get some rest and that I would be seeing him soon. 

After talking to him, I just couldn't shake that worry away, like I already knew. And I actually cried in the office. My heart actually sank, and I immediately called my eldest sister, begging her to go back to Kluang and see how Abah was doing in the hospital. I was crying all the time. And when I was doing my Asar prayer, I felt that tingling feeling in my heart, and I was crying in my prayer.

Later that evening, my eldest sister called me to tell me to come home, to see Abah. She said that Abah didn't really look that good, that he was not his usually self.

When I was in the car with Hubby, I told him what I felt and that I wanted to go back that night to see Abah. But he dismissed my feeling saying that I got carried away, and that it was probably nothing. We had an argument in the car, and I will never forget what I said to him then. Though I was still feeling unsettled, I didn't press the issue.

Later that night at 2.30 am, 19 Jan 2013, the call came from my sister saying that Abah had been called by the Almighty. Only He knew how I felt, and how crushed I was...

Six days apart from arwah Musa bin Ahmad, and buried side by side...

Ya Allah, ampunkan lah dosa mereka.

Ringankan lah siksa kubur dan neraka.

Kau tempatkan lah mereka di kalangan orang2 yang beriman.

Al-Fatihah 

Mohd Syirhu bin Ahmad

Nazri bin Ahmad

Musa bin Ahmad

Ahmad bin Jaafar